Will I live as I've tried in the past?

Today, I was flattered to be asked to take the leading role in serving the Daniel fellowship with the service of worship. I was amazed at first, and then all the past thoughts and experiences came rushing through my head... the different styles, the songs, the ways to sing, ways to play the guitar, frustrations, triumphs, the music, the drums, the worship nights, SOP, SOWer, singing to harmonize, studio recording, song writing attempts... and then, all of a sudden, I came to a screeching halt. The people that were working with me just packed up and leave... actually, I'm not sure if I was the first to pack or not.

I definitely needed prayer. I've serve in the same role... many times before since 1988. God had seemed to bestow upon me certain talents in music... while the meeting went on and we moved on to address other concerns, my head was thinking about what will I do... this time around.

God has given me another chance to serve him. Despite my past weakness, my lack of ability, my insistence... I wonder if I will be using what I knew from before, or will I be able to start anew. Using a heart that's untainted. Passion unextinquished. Love unmarked.. Sometimes I'm envious of the new Christians that we were so blessed to have recently. I wish that my flame can re-ignite. That it can burn without being hindered...

And everything starts again... now, with prayer